We interrupt your coverage of the General Elections to bring you a piece of breaking news.
That's right, folks. It's British Pie Week!
Apple. Pork. Mince. Banoffee. Cottage. Mississippi Mud. & Mash.
Oh the possibilities are endless. In honour of this week (beginning 2nd March), we're just going to bombard you with pointless pie facts and jokes and weird & wonderful pies. We also won't blame you if you leg it to Pieminister or The Stable in the next 5 minutes...
The World Custard Pie Championships were first held in 1967 in Kent. Teams stand 8ft apart and chuck pies at the opponents. This year's event will be on 6th June 2015 at Coxheath, Maidstone. Registration has just opened so email email@example.com and GET THROWING PIES. Seriously.
The Fence Gate Inn in Lancashire really love their pies and charged a record-setting £8,195 for a pie – or £1,024 per slice. What was in it - Ryan Gosling's number!?
(Vintage wine gravy, ultra-fancy ingredients and gold leaves, that's what.)
According to pastry maker Jus-Rol, the Brits' favourite pie is the good'ol steak and kidney (30%), closely followed by steak and ale (26%).
People have listed recipes for Hot Dog pies, Cheeseburger pies, Mac & Cheese pies. Take your pick, they're googlable (and oh so calorific).
Cheesy Joke 1: Why did the pie go to a dentist?
Because he needed a filling.
Cheesy Joke 2: What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?