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Quotes – 2005 / 2006

Katie: "Don't worry, I won't bite you...it's Tuesday."
Katie starts off the year's quotes in fine style

Christine:"Let's read that verse in Romans again."
Anne:"Why, has it changed?"

Ed:"How many cells do people have, anyway?"
John:"Well, I started counting mine last night..."

Ed:"So the birds ate the white moths"
Angela:"Those were racist birds!"
Angela gives her scientific opinion

"Evolution started in the 1940s and '50s"
Tom

"My beer!!"
Angela enjoys the BANG! summer barbeque.

Laura: "So you were flashing your lecturer?"
To Steve.

"I don't usually honk."
Steve

"I've never been sung to by a bus before"
Andrew tells us about his birthday

Sam: "They're just like dogs!"
Referring to Ed, Tom and Christine

"Maybe we should bleach people?"
Laura

"Lots of people don't taste very nice"
Yup, Laura again

Tom: "Are you into weird things?"
James: "To a certain extent."
(pause)
James: "I do it in Sci-Fi all the time."
No, I'm not quite sure what he's talking about.

"God knows He's never right."
Tom propounds an interesting viewpoint.

"But blue stars are blue!"
James

Alison: "You're not wearing a dress."
Steve: "How do you know?"

"Bites come from Guppy"
Laura

Tom: "There's more to maths than arithmetic."
Llinos: "Is that what adding's called?"

Alison: "And if that happens, she'll be sent to prison."
Ed: "Which prison?"

Tom: "You're quiet and never cause any trouble."
To Claire, who denies it vehemently.

"I never see any people in my kitchen, but when I leave I'll really miss them."
Claire

"That's quite vague and catch-all, but at the same time I think it's probably very accurate."
Sam saying exactly what he means. Probably.

"Aaaah...gagging people..."
Laura

Alison: "Either she's an alcoholic or she's turning into a sheep"
She's talking about Laura.

"I saw a classic chav today. He was 84."
Steve tells us about his adventures in Bristol.

Retreat quotes:

Steve: "Maybe Tom is an elf"
Old Steve was eager to get the quoting for the weekend started...

Alison: "I'm going to get my landlord a fishing rod and a little hat!"
I'd love to see that...

Steve: "If I had to share a room with Tom, I'd live in a garage."
But Tom doesn't live in a garage...

Steve: "I'm taking a handbag on the sunrise walk."
And I wasn't there, so I'm going to report that he did.

Christine: "I'm with it!"
The funny thing is that she doesn't see why this is a quote...

Alison: "Don't mess with me!"
She comes from Croydon...what more need we say?

Laura: "You tried to stab me!"
Steve: "No, you walked back onto the knife..."

Adam: "This flapjack tastes of peppermint"
Laura had made us a cake with a whole bottle of peppermint essence in. Everything was tasting of peppermint.

Steve: "I started talking before I'd actually thought."
This could explain a lot...

Steve: "What are people giving up for Lent?"
Anon: "Angela!"
Don't worry, Angela, we love you really.

Katie: "When things rot, they become pepperminty"
The cake was really starting to get to people...

Christine: "You hardly live in Ireland"
To Young Steve. Who doesn't deny it...

Adam: "I know the author of Hebrews"
Obviously he's older than we thought...

Alison: "There's a hole in my cow!"

Katie: "Stop fondling Steve's tail!"
Unfortunately I don't know who she said this to...or why they were molesting Steve...

Christine: "Bears are the best bears"

Alison: "Why is Ed?"
Why indeed? This became something of a theme for the weekend, and no-one ever really found an answer. Bit worrying really...

Alison: "Steve's actually a gooseberry"
He probably is, too...

Laura: "Ceilings are great"

Ed: "Anyone who steps on a birds immediately forfeits £50"

Anne: "We're all doomed! (pause) Sorry, that was just a random comment."
Anne was determined to get on the quotes page somehow

Steve: "If we were ants...(pause)...we wouldn't be having this discussion if we were ants."

Steve: "I'm the harsh, vicious one everyone's scared of"
Or he would be, if he were judging a singing competition.

Alison: "I tend to continue nodding after he's stopped speaking"
About Steve...

Laura: "That phrase makes me want to punch everyone"

Alison: "I was in my bed, and then suddenly I wasn't"
We had wondered what all the noise was...

Christine: "I looked at the lettuce, and it was wobbling"
This managed to occupy her for quite some time...

Steve: "You can chew and write, but you can't talk and write."

Alison: "There are no corners"

Steve: "Why is she eating herself?"
I'd appreciate it if anyone could tell me the context of this one...on its own it rather scares me...

Ruth: "It's still last Tuesday"
It starts to get to you after a while...

Ruth: "I'm a small person, I need to grow"
Steve: "It doesn't work!"

Christine: "There's only some left"
Christine was adamant that we ate all the pasta before we were allowed any cake

Adam: "More Steves? We've already got 3"

Christine: "If everyone has three more bits of pasta, we'll be done..."

Steve: "Are you Katie's boyfriend's mum?"
To Christine

Christine: "Did you all get the same amount of Steve?"

Laura: "I like the word 'irre'"

Katie: "I think that lulls in the conversation are normally distributed with mean 20 and standard deviation 5"
Katie brings a little maths into the conversation

Laura: "Green is evil and must be stopped!"

Alison: "If you drink milk, you can drink black coffee later and it'll mix"

Steve: "When I go off and have a lie down, it all descends into a seance"

Katie: "I'm going to be a pastatenerian"
Apparently they refuse to eat pasta...

Katie: "Hang on, vegeterians eat meat"
You see, it comes from the Greek vegetos, meaning to sit very still and throw things at sheep. Yes, of course they had a word for that...well, they do in Welsh...

Laura: "Pasta is being sentenced to 5 years in jail"
Pasta wasn't too popular by the end of the meal...

Alison: "Maybe they were turning into mice..."

Christine: "Steve's knocked it on the nail"

Christine: "Did Adam clean Katie as well?"
Making sure all the jobs were done...

Laura: "The floor is exciting, very exciting..."

Adam: "Ed, you're spinning and singing. I thought this wasn't a permissible activity in concentration camp Bang!?"
But I spin round and sing all the time...

Adam: "Please don't throw orange things at me"
Green ones, however, are fine, albeit a bit evil.

Laura: "If you put an ice lolly in the toaster, it goes manky"

Christine: "I had to choose between money and cookies, and cookies won"
As it should be...

Ed: "I'm the only normal one here"
I should know better than to say such ridiculous things...

Scores:
Our reigning champion for two years running, with 12 quotes: Old Steve!
Hot on his heels with 10 quotes each: Alison and Christine
No-one else had more than 6 quotes. Let these people be your models!

Walk quotes:

"Sam, you didn't flash enough!"
Steve. It's alright, he's talking about photography.

"Ed now lives in a tree."
Sam

"I'm called Steve!"
Remarkably enough this observation was made by Steve Roberts.

"They were sitting on the kitchen."
Christine, who must have a very interesting house indeed.

"Allison was shampooing Laura?"
Christine listens in on the wrong conversation.

"Who else wants to bite me?"
Laura

"Laura knows all about me and Angela."
Steve

Ed: "It came from the graveyard!"
Tom: "Did you?"
Ed: "No, the milk-float did!"
I'm sane, I promise...

"Well, if we're talking about fish years...erm...I don't know what fish years are."
Christine makes her point.

John: "That was short, snappy, concise, and to the point."
(pause) "I just said all those words but I didn't realise they meant the same thing."

"Oh no, it's you! I thought the table was vibrating."
Laura to Allison

"Christine, give Steve to Ed."
About 5 people simultaneouely

"Angela is not allowed to touch Steve."
Steve reassures us all

Thorpe Park quotes:

Alison: "It's not really trivia if he already knows!"
(after Steve tried to amaze Tom by telling him about the Turnstile bunker in Box Hill)

Christine: "Harder! Harder! Harder!"
I don't know the context of this one, but it would be nice if someone could tell me.

Tom: "Who left that social secretary there?"
(after tripping over Laura)

"It ate my ticket!"
Steve

"I'm trying to eat Tom."
Claire

"Please stand behind the yellow line which is painted yellow on the ground."
Some random park employee

"Please do not stroke my hand with your doughnut."
Steve

"I think Tom wants some sauce."
Laura

"The buses are every 15 minutes: on the hour, 20 past, 40... so every 10 minutes."
Another random functionary

Laura: "I wasn't doing anything to anyone!"
Steve: "For once."

"You can't walk round holding onto your arse Steve."
Allison

"Average height, below-average weight, below-average looks, above-average intelligence, above-average smell..."
Tom.

"Claire's better than Staines?"
Christine

Steve: "I didn't gaze into his eyes as he leapt into my arms."
About a man who collided with him after jumping off the train at Staines Platform 2.

"This is where the lack of sleep slarts [sic] to catch up with me."
Christine

Tom: "My nose is all wet now!"
Steve: "So you're a healthy dog!"

"When I answered the phone there were no cars on it."
Claire

"People are funny things and they do funny things."
Claire makes a profound observation.

Waggon and Horses trip in the 2005/06:

Ed: "We officially saw a flying riverboat with a qreen head."
I think he's talking about a duck. But you can never quite tell with Ed.

Ed: "Oh, there's moo-moo cows over there as well."

Katie: "Thou shalt not drive a sports car over this bridge."

Ed: "Good law. I like it."

Adam: "I'm not sure the Archbishop of Canterbury is supposed to go around kicking people."
Tom's ambitions were not entirely popular.